Tuesday, June 29, 2004
day 2 of A1 Driving School
Guess who drove all the way down Xavierville Avenue , through Anonas, down Quezon Avenue, through UP, and back to Katipunan again today! Mwahahahaha! I stalled a few times, causing minor disruptions in traffic, and causing crescendoes of furious honking from behind. But I was not fazed!!! I was not cowed by their pompous honking! Like a a rhinocerous shaking off a gnat bite, I merely tossed my head, and plowed on. Ha ha! Indeed, I am great.
I absolutely despised my instructor at first. He's stricter, he's got less tact than my first instructor, points out more mistakes, and talks in a way that always sounds like he's talking down at you. I started acting like a brat of course, and started answering back, until he scolded me and said, "Mali ang ginagawa mo! Huwag kang magaglit kapag tinuturuan kita! Para sa iyo naman toh, hindi ito para saakin!" ( Oo nga naman) I ended up learning more from him than the other guy.
Perhaps I shall conquer EDSA next!
I still dread driving though.
art gallery
Tomorrow is day 3 of art gallery internship. I gotta admit it's a little slow and boring. I stay in a white office filled with really interesting art pieces but aside from that, there's only a few desks, a few computers (PCs at that, not Macs. I didn't know how to save a Word document I made), and 3 other people: Richie Lerma the curator, Joel the assistant curator, and Yollie the secretary. It's very quiet. But hey, I wasn't expecting alot of hustle and bustle. It is and art gallery. I'm just not used to it that's all. Makes me realize how constantly surrounded by noise I am.
It also made me realize that I work best right here, at my desk, in my room, surrounded by blaring speakers, and having constant inter-net access. I had to type something in the office yesterday, and I just felt like I couldn't! But when I got home, I got it done right away.
You learn alot about art though through snippets of conversation, and I enjoyed looking through the catalogue and having Joel tell me all about every single painting.
Right now, I'm involved in planning the Ateneo Art Awards. We're awarding young artists who have pioneered in the development of modern art in the Philippines.
I'm not particularly up to writing any more about it right now. :-p Bangag, noh?
cele-blogs
I've been reading through a few celebrity blogs lately: Maxene Magalona, Ciara Sotto, Paula Perallejo... there are quite alot out there, you'd be surprised. Reading their entries, I can totally relate to their need as television personalities to have some kind of outlet to present an image of themselves as "real people".
I'm no major celebrity. I don't even like the word celebrity. It always sounded pretentious to me. But for lack of a better term, I shall be using the word celebrity quite loosely in this entry.
As I said, I am no major celebrity in comparison to other "celebrity bloggers" who have been in showbiz since heaven knows when. I did a stint on MYX for a year and half, then I stopped, and now I'm completely out of that whole scene. I don't get mobbed in malls or gossiped about at school. Still, I experienced a little bit of the TV personality's life, the stereotyping to you fall victim to, the haters, the harsh comments and criticisms that shatter you even though you so badly don't want it to.
When I began this site, it was for two purposes:
a. To write. I love to write.
b. To show people out there who ignorantly label models/actresses as bobo and superficial that there's a brain, a personality, and some humanity behind the 2-dimensional, moving image you see on your TV screen.
Reason B was my secret reason, of course. I never would've admitted it then. But yes, I was very overwhelmed when I started coming out on TV, overwhelmed by how quickly people label you, objectify you, judge you. Objectification was the worst part I think. You become a character to them, something that has no origin, like you just popped out of thin air one day. Like you can't get hurt. Like Mickey Mouse.
Reading other "celebrity blogs", I can totally see that same need to show the world their humanity. They want to tell the world that when they read something bad someone says about them on some random inter-net message board, it does hurt. They do surf the web. They do read books. They do aspire to be something else other than famous and glamorous. Yes, they do have lives, secrets, and opinions that aren't always pleasing or politically correct. And yes, no matter how you put it, showbiz is hard, hard work, and in the end, it's a job and they are only employees.
They complain about the same stuff I've been through, people who try to put them down or harrass them for no reason. Paula for one constantly gets hate-comments from cowardly people who hide behind the guise of pseudonyms. I've gotten my own share of people who post things with the very intent of annoying you, or angering you. When you react, it gives them a rush and makes them feel special and superior that they are able to get a celebrity's attention and/or disrupt a celebrity's peace of mind. Then they can have the pleasure of telling their friends that they pissed a celebrity off. "Ooooh, see how I outsmarted the celebrity."
It does happen. But not to me, thank God.
Of course, I'm not one to talk. After all, I'm just an unemployed adult now who had a short stint in television, a moment of glory, then kaput.
But what I'm trying to say is, blogging has provided them with a way to project who they really are, a domain beyond the control of cameras, talent managers, and scripts.
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Saturday, June 26, 2004
and now for a little self-indulgence
I wish I still drew as much as I did in high school. My drawings, paintings, ceramics, figurines and what-not are randomly stored about the house, and every now and then I feel this desperate need to see them all together again, like long lost children. This morning I was almost in tears because I couldn't find the sketch book I drew in religiously in high school. Drawing was a strict discipline for between ages 13-17 but I didn't know it then. I would draw my day, in a nut-shell, in those little boxes on my organizer. I painstakingly kept at it throughout my Holy Spirit days because it made me happy. My life soon became public due to the entire class peeking at it everyday to see what I had drawn. It even won "Best Organizer" in my high school yearbook. Here's a spread from the latter part of my organizer days, right before I stopped in 2000:
In college, I switched to a larger format and got a day planner instead. Here are random doodles from random pages made in 2002:
I consider the next paintings the first "grown-up" paintings I ever made because I had finally got sick of drawing the Disney cartoons I drew all the time when I was 11. At the time I made these, I was doing alot of graffiti art (I listened to nothing bu hip-hop music), and pixies. I had short hair, and both paintings are self portraits. Now the reason why they're "grown-up" paintings is because it was inspired by the first real teen-age angst I ever felt. I liked this Lasallista guy. We would talk on the phone everyday, but he didn't like me back (aaah, high school. All the guys I liked were Lasallistas). The real paintings are about 3 feet high, both done in 1998. Wish I could capture the real color though.
I was forced to make this in art class. I hate it when I'm forced to draw fruits and vegetables. I know you need it to learn shading, and texture, and proportion bla, bla, bla, but it makes me sick. I like this one I made though. My teacher allowed me fly free with it and it looks different from the usual ones they make me do. I'm very proud of the banana in the center. If you see the actual painting, it looks very realistic, like you could pick it off the page. It has freckles, and bruises and all. The orange sucks though.
These are bunch of portraits I did in 2002. I was very depressed at that time (and therefore very inspired) so I was really drawing a lot. Most of my depression art was done on ceramics though and I was too lazy to bring them out and wipe them clean.
I really love drawing people. I've just always had the knack for it. I rarely do landscapes and still-life, always people. I was drawing people in a very angsty style then. Reflected the mood of the times I guess.
This is my latest. I haven't done a real honest-to-goodness painting since 3rd year college. I made this in May 2004, inspired by our gorgeous Palawan trip.
And finally: Heart Evangelista drew this. The bidding starts now. Anyone? Anyone? Just kidding. :-)
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Thursday, June 24, 2004
My niece has a very intense and knowing stare. She'll focus really intently at something for minutes and minutes at a time. It's not like she can actually see anything. Even when you make her face another direction, she'll keep her head in the direction she was staring at. Even the doctor said it was a little unusual for a 2 week old to have a gaze like that. Maybe she has the 6th sense. Ang taray niya tumitig. Parang nanay ko.
abooboo coochicoochivuvuvuvu mumumumubababoo!
She's a pretty one.
So I'm a proud tita. So what.
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Tuesday, June 22, 2004
i found a picture of my flying man
... from the Cirque du Soleil website.
There's an aerial ballerina in the back. Of course, this picture doesn't even come close to doing justice to the actual performance.
something i didn't think i'd be doing this year
I had the craziest shoot yesterday. As always, we're not allowed to let out any details until the campaign comes out. Let's just say I was in underwear (decent, wholesome underwear) in a public place. Well not really in a public place, but it was right by a fence, and outside the fence was a public place, and the fence was very see-through. Good God. I think that's the most daring thing I've done in ages.
I appeared on the site in a robe, already made up. I'm a pretty makapal person and I don't usually care if they make me do crazy things on camera. In fact, I like doing crazy things in front of a camera. But for this shoot, I was a little shocked to find we weren't in a secluded area, and I really had to take a deep breath before taking the plunge, and removing the robe.
Nagpakapal talaga ako ng mukha.
It was embarrassing at first, and I could see all these slacker, adolescent boys and jeering drivers crowding outside, and I had to tell myself to pretend they weren't there. But after awhile, hey... I thought, "p*tangina nila"! Haha, it's blunt I know but after that thought, I felt pretty ready to kick some ass for the camera.
It turned out fun. I can't post any pictures now but you'll see it all on a billboard somewhere when it comes out.
tambay!
Man I miss college. I realized it today when I went to Ateneo and saw that my old bench, my second home for the past four years, had been invaded by the new batch of freshmen. Unfamiliar faces everywhere. Made me a little sad.
I met up with my cousin Gisa, who is a freshman, and toured her around Katipunan, brought her to "Ken Afford" and taught her how to take a tricycle. Man, I felt so old hahaha! Really made me feel like I've been through it all. I remember when I was freshman, I was so timid and I felt like the whole world was out to get me. Now I look back and realize how fun and simple it all was.
I had a great time showing her around Katipunan though. We were playmates growing up, until I kind of outgrew her all of a sudden. But now she's really catching up.
I started missing college even more when I hung out at Higad Bench today, which was always an alternative hangout place when noone was at my bench. I miss spending lazy afternoons talking to people. I had a blast just being around lots of people I haven't seen in a long time, and Conrad introduced me to Marla whose been reading my blog for ages (and vice versa).
I do have a reason to start going back to Ateneo though. I've started interning over at the Ateneo Art Gallery. I know some people think I'm an idiot for offering my services for free when I just graduated and I should be making money. But I haven't even started looking for a job. I worked throughout college and I just want to do things that make me happy and don't necessarily make money. So that's what I'm doing for now, among other things.
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Sunday, June 20, 2004
Things have definitely changed at home while I’ve been gone.
Before I left, I saw the baby only once at the hospital. I wasn’t there to see her come home. I wasn’t there to witness the first few sleepless nights wherein my mom and my sister would take turns taking care of Ananda. I didn’t see how the two slept on the same bed with the baby between them in an old, cardboard box that used to house a brand new DVD player.
So I barged through my front door at around noontime yesterday, suitcase in hand, and announcing my presence. “I’M HOOOOOOME!”, I yelled, like I always do when I get home from a long trip. I was immediately shushed, much to my surprise. “Be quiet, I finally got her to sleep!” It was my sister, who was sterilizing milk bottles in the kitchen, wearing a nursing top.
Weird.
It felt a little surreal for a while. I always felt like my sister stopped ageing at age 19. I don’t know why. She doesn’t dress any older even though she’s 25. Until she found out she was pregnant, she was one of those gimmick-happy, clubber people. She’s been a legal adult for four years but I sometimes still think of her as a teenager. Probably because her teenage years were so defined.
Anyway, it didn’t really hit me that she was a real mother, and not just someone playing mommy, till I came home and saw that the house had changed. My sister who I've shared a room with my entire life, whom I saw grow up, in a nursing top, sterilizing milk bottles. Wow. Weird. Things have definitely changed while I’ve been gone.
My niece has grown considerably over the ten days that I've been gone. She looks more human now. She sleeps alot and looks like Yoda when she cries. I haven't seen her as much as anyone else, so I'm dtill incredibly gigil over everything she does.
Wet dela Musique
As you all know, I took a 28-hour journey from the US, taking three different stops, and traveling alone for the first time, to get to the Philippines on time to catch the Fete.
I battled jetlag, taking constant sips from a bottle of Extra Joss, a substance I reserve only for desperate times (like when I had to host at the Fete main-stage for four hours non-stop last year. Whew). With tired muscles, blurry eyesight, occasional attacks of fatigue, and impaired judgement, I went to the Fete. I was so bleary I couldn’t even cross the street by myself. I even forgot my friend Paolo V.’s name. I was so embarrassed. It was like extreme mental block. My God. It’s not like Paolo is a name that’s hard to remember. So Pao, if you read this, sorry talaga.
As you've probably all heard, the Fete was cut short at around 11 PM because of heavy rains that caused the roof of the mainstage to collapse on Radioactive Sago Project. Ang sad lang talaga. To think I had successfully beaten jetlag too. It was 11 PM and I was still standing and ready to party. Di ko man lang napanood Pinikpikan at saka Loquy.
Not that it wasn't alot of fun. I was there by 4 PM so I still caught some good stuff.
As always, I enjoyed Happy Meals, but the fans started moshing and God, I HATE moshpits! Rowdy, bottle-throwing, woman-violating adolescents. Argh. So I had to clamber backstage to get away from the moshers. Luckily I got a backstage pass that said "Artist: Rock". Yeah! It's one of the privileges of dating a musician. I have so many IDs and passes I've saved up from different music events I've gone to with Nino, and they all say either "artist", "crew", or "band". Hahaha!
Here's 3/4 of the Happy Meals: Odin, Nino, and Tedmark. Cute nila.
Then there was Greyhoundz. I cannot get over how different they sound without Allen. Somehow they sound less demonic, and demented. If it wasn't for Reg's singing, they'd sound alternative-ish. I stayed backstage during their portion too. Come to think of it, I've never watched a Greyhoundz gig from the audience. It gets too violent. Nino makes me stay backstage, which is fine with me.
Boy Elroy played. Ang cute mo, Conrad! Promise! Too bad I was backstage, lying down on Nino's guitar case, having one of my fatigue attacks so I was barely able to watch.
Caught Hellbender and man, they were good. Very good. Not surprising, really. Looking forward to their future projects.
And lastly, I saw Kevin Roy! Yay, yeehee! Pero badtrip man, because right at the moment when I was stepping forward to say hello (now that he finally makes me pansin), someone grabbed me from behind and covered my eyes, and played the whole "guess-who-I-am" game. I started squealing in protest but the person wouldn't let me go. And when I finally guessed who it was, my little brother... wala na si Kevin Roy. Buwisit na bata! :-p
I saw some of the old MYX crew too! Bobby, my old stylist whom I spent many hours in the dressing room with, gossiping and ranting about life, and Ramesh, one of the sweetest people ever. Awww, I miss them.
Here's the only pic I have of myself at Fete. That's Therese and Sara with me. Conrad and Fabul were supposed to be in the pic too but they got cropped out haha. I bought the Swedish goatherd hat at a vintage store at Haight.
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Friday, June 18, 2004
my eyes have seen the glory of the nudie bikers
note: due to lack of internet connection in Disney World (to be explained in this entry), the following entries are all horribly overdue.
June 13, Sunday
San Francisco
Yesterday, my cousin Eric took me to Haight Street to do some vintage store shopping. We were looking for a place to park, he at the wheel, and I at the driver’s seat. It was a clear, sunny day, a deviation from the windy chill of the past week. There were no spaces, and we were beginning to feel a little harassed as the afternoon grew sleepier.
We were at an intersection, when all of a sudden, from over the horizon, like a vision or mirage, they came!
Lo and behold, bikers! No wait… NUDE BIKERS! Dozens of them, all gloriously naked, save for Nike shoes, and helmets or hats (but of course, we must protect ourselves from the sun’s harmful rays, even when in the nude, mustn’t we?). A couple of the women wore spandex panties though. I speculate that it was either their time of the month, or they just couldn’t take a bicycle seat hitching up their, er, crack. Some of the others wore a little body paint. They peddled past us, blissfully cruising along, smiling warmly and confidently as all around them, jaws dropped.
There was no banner, no signs, no flags, nothing that signified a statement or a political message. Just a couple dozen naked men and women on bicycles, peddling down Haight Street, on a clear, sunny day.
They streaked by us, a blur of pasty skin, bristly hair, testicles, breasts, and cellulite. And then, they were gone, the only vestiges of them having been there being bewildered pedestrians, either scandalized or wickedly delighted, still with cameras in hand.
And of course, I know you’re all dying to know whether or not I got pictures!!! Would I let a photo-op like this go by? Hell, no!
All Eric had to say was, “I do not want any memory of that!” Pffft!
in other (less interesting) news
I had a lovely day shopping at the Haight with Jon, John, Paul, and Eric. Raided the vintage stores, all packed with authentic and perfectly preserved clothes from the 60s, 70s, and 80s. I got a Led Zeppelin shirt, and a beat up old Zeppelin belt buckle, which I think was made in the 60s. I also got an awesome old hat, and a Jem and the Holograms tank top! Hurrah! Also bought a bunch of second hand CDs: Herbie Hancock for myself, Jaco Pastorious for the boyfriend, and Steve Vai for the little bro. I love Haight Street! Had an awesome time with Jon, Paul, and Eric showing me around and treating me out to a beer. San Francisco is gorgeous!
The other day we drove down to Monterey to visit Carmel in honor of my lola’s death anniversary. It was one of her favorite places, and it was one of the prettiest places I had ever seen. The Monterey Aquarium was beautiful, too. Too bad jet lag caught up with me and I ended up snoozing in the car during the 17 Mile Drive.
Although I was a little reluctant to go on this trip, I think this vacation is doing me good. As I type, I am on my way to Florida to spend a few days in Disneyworld. Another change of time zone. Not good. I’m going to need a little Extra Joss to keep me up for the Fete when I get home on the 19th. There is no way that I am missing it.
June 14, Monday
Disney World, Flordiarantings of an internet addict
It’s really, really hard to believe that a major hotel in a major world tourist destination in the first of the first world countries lacks inter-net. No wireless connectivity, no inter-net lounge or business center. They do offer you dial-up inter-net in your room for 60 dollars an hour which is major overkill, not to mention absolutely antiquated technology. Antiquated for a place like Disney World at least. You’d think they’d have discovered DSL by now.
Welcome to Disney’s Animal Kingdom Lodge, providing shelter for 1,200 rooms’ worth of Disney World’s tourists, and it’s menagerie of African animals. This is where I am staying for now. What Christianity is to the Vatican, Mickey Mouse is to Disney World. They worship Mickey Mouse as their god here, and the other Disney cartoons (Goofy, Donald, Ariel, Dumbo, etc.) are the angels and saints. Instead of the Sistine Chapel, St. Peter’s Basilica, etc., they have Pirates of the Caribbean, The Haunted House, The Tree of Life, etc. Both the Vatican and Disney World operate the same way, having an independent government.
But as of now, the comparison ends there. I read in “AsiaWeek” (or was that “Time”?) that the Vatican is one of the world’s pioneering wireless cities right now. The pope is a pretty high-tech guy. Included in that list of pioneering places is Pakistan. Two-thirds of Pakistan has gone wireless, and the remaining lines that aren’t wireless are considered “unreliable”.
So if the Vatican, and a desert can go wireless, why can’t Disney World??? L
Overlooking the lack of inter-net connection, this is a gorgeous hotel were staying in. The whole thing is Africa themed and it’s really beautiful. I’ve found 3 Hidden Mickeys since I got here, and I have a picture where I’m giving Rafikki a hug! I can’t wait to go to Epcot Center, and Cirque du Soleil!
June 17, Thursday
Disney World, Flordiachecking out
I’m all set to leave for home in an hour, but not without a stop-over at Denver, Colorado, then another stop at San Francisco before I head off to my last stop before Manila, Hong Kong. This is going to be the longest journey of my life. I am so not looking forward to it. I’ll be traveling alone too. The consolation I get though is that after this, I’ll be able to travel alone anywhere.
So, I’ve spent the past four days in Disney World. Here are my highlights:
Magic Kingdom
Day one didn’t start off too well. We headed off to Magic Kingdom in the afternoon, “the place where magic lives”. It all started out nicely, with the “Philharmagic” 3D ride, featuring all my favorite, childhood cartoons in 3D (Oh, I love you Peter Pan!). But, things got pretty stressful before long. It was pouring and I was cold under an unflattering, plastic, Mickey Mouse poncho. It was overpopulated, and we couldn’t even find a place to sit because everything was wet. Two of the rides broke down on us. They made us turn around and leave at “Pirates of the Caribbean” after 40 minutes in line, and right when it was our turn to board, too. They closed it down for the rest of the night because some idiot had stood up during the ride, which caused some kind of technical difficulty.
The Peter Pan ride also broke down in the middle. Afterwards, we watched the fireworks but it was raining so all the smoke settled on the ground and became smog. By then, my picon level had risen to maximum level. I was ready to tear my hair out at every annoyance. And as if we weren’t malas enough, I looked in a mirror afterwards and found a bloody little spot on my face, like a pockmark. I got hit on the cheek by a spark from the fireworks. That got me pretty pissed, al right.
So much for “the place where magic lives”. Naubusan yata sila ng magic that day. It was a bad day to be at Magic Kingdom.
Epcot Center
This is the coolest place on earth! I love the “Mission Space” ride, and the “Test Track”, and “Space Ship Earth”. It’s a beautiful place, it’s educational, and not as utterly commercial as Magic Kingdom. I was lucky enough to catch the “IllumiNations” show. Fireworks, lasers, water, sound, and lights, all in one. Gorgeous.
Cirque Du Soleil
This was the real highlight of the entire trip (well, besides the naked bikers of course). We watched the Cirque Du Soleil. If you’ve never heard the name before, it’s the best circus on earth. It’s the circus you see in your dreams, redefined, and like you’ve never seen before. They don’t use animals, only acrobats.
So we caught their show, “La Nouba”. Oh my God. I felt like I was caught in a big, wonderful dream the whole time. It was so beautiful, and the costumes and production were absolutely stunning. It was a mix of the old and traditional circuses, with a stunning, modern twist. Beautiful! It was like watching a big, moving painting the whole time. It was like seeing all the beautiful but senseless visions that dance around in your head right before you wake up.
All of it was performed to a beautiful soundtrack, performed by a live band, and live vocalists. The music was a mix of everything: techno, jazz, classical, hip-hop, rock, opera, gospel. Wow. I went out and got the CD afterwards.
My favorite performer was this man who would fly around the stadium with only two flowing strips of red silk as his “harness”. The cloth would billow out behind him like two beautiful, red wings, while ballerinas dangled from the ceiling performing acrobatics, also from strips of red silk. The man flew so effortlessly, and gracefully, like a leaf being carried upwards by a gust of wind. His expression the whole time was serene, almost Zen-like. No smiles for the audience, no grandiose gestures. In fact, he acted almost as if the audience wasn’t there. He didn’t act like he was “performing”. He was in his universe, where flight was a natural thing.
The effect was absolutely dreamlike. It reminded me of all the times I dreamt I could fly. Funny how dreams of flying remain a constant throughout the lives of all persons, like a built in human desire. And yet, in dreams, we’re never really surprised to find that we can fly. It’s almost as if the ability to fly is something we’ve always known was inside us, something that could be possible, something we would rightfully claim as ours if ever it was to be bestowed on us.
This flying man was like those dreams. Wow.
Too bad photography wasn’t allowed.
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Friday, June 11, 2004
hello America
Here I am in my “homeland”, America. Well, not really. I’m bound to this country though my blue passport. Other than that, I feel no affinity with America. I’ve hardly been here for the last 9 years, and I feel like one of those gullible foreigners who don’t even know where to cross the street.
I traveled completely alone for the first time. I was a little nervous about American immigration. We’ve all heard immigration nightmare stories, and of random security checks. Luckily I have an American passport so they let me in immigration right away, but not without a few arrogant remarks from the guy in the booth.
It all started out with, “Where did you come from?”
“The Philippines. I live there.”
Then in a display of ethnocentricity, he said, “Oh, you live there! What do you do down there?”, in a tone that made it sound like I’ve been living in a miserable, disease ridden, pathetic, 3rd world corner of hell. Buwiset.
He also asked me what I was going to do here, as if my passport didn’t entitle me to be on this soil. Hello? I’m an American, and therefore, I am home, where I legally belong. Is there any reason to prevent or question that?
I’ve been told that while you’re going through immigration, so long as you’re still behind the yellow line, the person holding the rubber stamp is God so I knew better than to retort.
I didn’t get hassled by anyone after that, although I was a little surprised when I had to go through four different people just to have my customs declaration form checked. I went through a round of stupid questions.
“Do you have any food?”
“No.”
“No snacks?”
(Ang kulit!) “Nope.”
“Why not?”
(Because I don’t eat?) “Because… the airline gives you food.”
What unnecessary questioning!
In front of me at the next line was an old Chinese man in a wheel chair who obviously didn’t speak good English. He was being interrogated by an airport official. I didn’t know what it was about, but the guy was being asked: “So, who bought your ticket then?” Does that really matter? I think these airport guys just want to have someone to harass to feel powerful.
The Chinese guy was obviously a little muddled and couldn’t answer in straight English, and he was finally let through. As if the whole question-and-answer power play wasn’t unnecessary enough, the guy interrogating him didn’t even occupy a high position. He was only a security guard.
He let me through hassle-free because he probably thought I was 16. Plus I’m female and alone. It’s good to play the vulnerable female.
gorgeous san Francisco
Other than all of that, San Francisco is gorgeous. A little too cold though. I hate cold. Cold and jetlag do not go well together.
I spent the afternoon at the Legion of Honor. They were having an Art Deco exhibit with beautiful old furniture, ceramics, posters, dresses, appliances, and get this: two authentic Tamara Lempicka paintings. I never dreamed I would see a real one, much less two. They were absolutely perfect, every stroke smooth, deliberate, and beautiful. Too bad photography was not allowed.
I also saw some Rodin sculptures, erotic as ever. The guy was a pervert, but a pervert with talent. A genius pervert. In Paris, I saw all his statues that depict rape and I was a little shocked. But I was very shocked today when I saw his “Christ and Magdalene” . It was Christ suffering on the cross, naked and throwing his head back in a kind of delirious moan, with a naked Mary Magdalene desperately pressed against his body in a way that was very sexual. I wonder if the Church was ever scandalized.
I love art museums. I could spend a whole trip just viewing art.
Then I went to watch Harry Potter on IMAX. Awesome. I hated the first two but I enjoyed this one. I love Gary Oldman as Sirius Black and I loved Lupin.
And finally, to end my day, I bought CDs! Marcus Miller, Lee Ritenour, Pat Metheny, Dave Weckl, The Mahavishnu Orchestra, John Patitucci, Etta Jones, and Diana Krall’s latest. I also bought a double disc DVD of Led Zeppelin live performances! Yippeee! I splurged because I know I’ll never find those back in the Philippines.
The only thing I hate is that all the food here seems to be deep-fried and/or smothered in lard. Won’t be surprised if I gain ten pounds here.
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Tuesday, June 08, 2004
I leave for San Francisco tomorrow. I feel sad about leaving behind my little niece and my still-delicate, c-sectioned sister. I wish I could be there to welcome Ananda home. Can you tell how crazy I am over this kid? She deserves to have another picture posted on the web, this time with ninang!so who's NOT coming to the Fete?
I'll be home on the morning of the 19th. I 'm going hom earlier than everybody else for the Fete dela Musique! In case you've been living under a rock, the Fete is an annual music festival brought to us by Alliance de Francaise. Dozens of countries celebrate it every year, all at the same time. The universal rules that all nations must follow in celebrating the Fete are: a. there should be TONS of bands; b. it should be held in a wide open space; and c. by all means, it should be free, meaning no admission fee. It's France's little contribution to the world (among other things...like er, french kissing!)
I love the Fete! I've been hosting it the past two years, but this year I'm not so I get to wander around and enjoy good, live music. This year it's going to be in Eastwood, June 19. Like last year, there's a World Music stage, a Rock stage, Reggae, Hiphop, Electronica, Jazz, percussions, Blues... take your pick! Or try to check out all the stages for maximum enjoyment. Check out www.fetemanila2004.com
Here is my list of bands/artists I am watching out for:
1) Catch Loquy at the World Music stage (also known as the mainstage). This is Kevin Roy's other band aside from Razorback. Need I say more? Watch.
2) Pinikpikan! If you've never heard of them then good god, don't deprive yourself of this experience any longer. Watch them! This is Filipino World music. Something to call our own. You'd be f*cking proud too. Catch them at the World stage din sila.
3) The Happy Meals! Okay, it's not just because it's Nino's band. I love the Happy Meals. They're fun, fun, fun, totally danceable, and they've got a great vibe that just puts everyone in a happy mood... happy meals talaga, If you're into funk, catch them at the rock stage.
4) Boy Elroy! This is my friend Conrad's band. They're punk. He makes an adorable front man. Ladies, he's single, so go ahead and throw your undies at him while he's performing at the rock stage.
5) Hellbender! Magaling sila... um, yun Lang. Rock stage.
6) Hemp Republic! When you're tipsy enough to dance like noone's watching, Hemp Republic is where it's at. They're a reggae cover band, but they have bid trumpets and horns and stuff...yeah. They're fun. Check them out at the reggae stage. Check out Jeepney Joyride while you're at it. You'll never forget you saw these guys perform. I promise.
7)The Brass Munkeys. I've never actually seen them perform but if you're into big-band jazz, the kind with a huge brass section that gets people dancing (like in old movies), then go thither to the Jazz stage.
8) And lastly, I will definitely be watching Sugarfree, Cynthia Alexander, Kapatid, Greyhoundz and Kjwan.
9) Pinaka-last! The La Batterie (Drum Jam) seems really interesting too.
See y'all there!
Istates, here I come. :-p
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Monday, June 07, 2004
pictures of Ananda's first 24 hours
In the Caesarian room
Here she is popping out of mommy!
It's a girl (as you can see!)
And she's all the way out!!! Welcome, Ananda!
Cutting the cord!
The tired (but happy) family!
In the huggery!
"Hi, Ninang Ala!"
She's such a pretty, pretty baby! She has nice, dainty, rosebud lips, and a full head of black hair! She's maputi like her mommy and she got daddy Tristan's nose!
She's such a good kid too. Quiet but very alert, and doesn't cry when different people hold her. I'm in love!!! :-)
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Ananda Aleisha Paredes
Born June 7, 12:30 AM, 7.11 lbs, 53 cm, to Mommy Erica and Daddy Tristan in Asian Hospital! Mom and baby are both fine and healthy after C-section!
PICTURES TO FOLLOW!!! I'm a tita, I'm a tita! Awww, I'm crying! Hahaha!
I'm two night's puyat and I have to get up early again tomorrow but I'm too happy to sleep!!! Life is truly a miracle!
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Thursday, June 03, 2004
the last few days take forever
I've been writing alot about babies lately. It's becoming some sort of obsession. That's what happens to you when you live with a pregnant woman. All of a sudden, the world is abundant with expectant mothers, and babies, babies, babies.
My sister, the pregnant woman, has been particularly obsessed with pregnancy, more than the average pregnant woman. She's like a walking pregnancy encyclopedia. While it's great that she's sufficiently informed about what she's experiencing, from birthpains to body fluids, it can sometimes drive you a little crazy hearing about feti, cervixes, contractions, being fat, etc. When she moved back in with us during the start of her third trimester, she stayed in my room for about two months, and each night she would ramble endlessly about being pregnant, every sensation, every kick, every cramp, every pound gained.
Thanks to all of this, I know so much about pregnancy and childbirth by now. I've listened to her ramblings, sat in on two of her lamaze classes, and have read all her pregnancy books and magazines. I even helped her paint the nursery. It used to be our drab, old guest room but now it's a lovely sage green room, with a tree, grass, and pink, and yellow tulips painted on the wall (tulips courtesy of me, ninang Ala).
My sister is bent on giving birth in Asian Hospital because for the same price as other hospitals, you get a room that looks like a hotel room. And apparently, if you're there for childbirth, you get a free shampoo with the package! Wow. People over there understand what being a woman is all about. Never mind that it takes hours to get from Katipunan to Alabang. She will go through fire and water to have her baby there. In fact, just to make sure she really does give birth there, she's been sleeping at the daddy's house in Paranaque just in case labor takes place...which can be any day, any second, any minute now. She's late in fact. Her due date was June 1.
Today I had a swimming party in Alabang, and I decided to drag along my sister's hospital bag, and baby bag, in case she might finally go into labor. At least I'd be in the same area already, and I could just run over to Asian Hospital with all her stuff. I even had the DVcamera with me, fully charged and loaded, to record the precious event (against her will most likely hahaha).
No luck though. I think even she's given up. She went back home from Paranaque today. Well, that baby better come out real soon. I'm so excited to post her picture on the web and make her birth anouncement. She's right on our doorstep. We're just waiting for her to come into our lives!
if you hate the word "sperm", don't read this
Just how much of our existence is coincidential? Just how much of it is planned? I've been leafing through this old book of my mothers that came out sometime in the early 80s called "Miracle of Life". It features all those full-color photograpsh they took of developing feti in the womb that were first featured in "national Geographic". It also features a full-page photograph of a microscopic view of a drop of semen. You can imagine what it looks like, a riot of sperm.
Think about it: only one in millions of those little critters actually come in contact with the egg. At that precise moment in time, your life blueprint is drawn out. All physical characteristics are encoded, finalized, fused into the egg, right at that moment of contact.
Now imagine the time of your conception: at that one point in time, any single one of those millions of sperm released could have been you. You could've been born a completely different person, if the sperm that became you had been late by just a milli-second.
It would interesting if someone could invent a way to view all the different millions of people that could've been you at that crucial moment in time, which brings me back to the topic of coincidence. Is it all coincidence? Is it all luck? And if it's luck, can there be mistakes then?
The sperms that became Mother Teresa, Adolf Hitler, Mahatma Gandhi, people who shaped the world... the sperms that created them, was that a coincidence? That out of millions of possibilities, it was that particular sperm that got lucky that day and produced these people who changed the destiny of the world?
If it's not coincidence, then why do we need all that sperm just to make one person? Or does God just make it that way to confuse us?
And if it's not coincidential, then why was that particular sperm chosen to be the one? If we really all have an individual plan and a mission, then we must've been given this precise set of genes for a purpose. Maybe it's not just sperm luck then. Who knows?
more...
At CRIBS yesterday, I held a month-old malnourished infant. It had the weight of a rag doll, with a skeleton made of wire. It was so frail, it could easily have been crushed with just one hand (forgive the brutal thought, but this kid barely even looked alive). It's skull was the size of a small apple. It was covered with fine hair, had limbs like sticks, and had a crazed gaze, eyes that wouldn't focus on anything. It looked more like a baby monkey, or a shrunken, wizened, old man than a baby.
But the weirdest thing about it was the thought that this shrunken, wretched, pathetic, screetching thing was a human being, a person, no different from you and me. A very, very tiny, unstable, and helpless human, but a human nonetheless. Makes you redefine your whole concept of "person". Even the defenseless and pathetic are persons, and deserve human dignity. Even the weakest somehow, miraculously, manage to stay alive.
so i'm going to the US on Wednesday
I'll be going to San Francisco, which I haven't been to since I was 12, and Florida, which I've nevet been to. I'll be gone for ten days, and I'll be back on the morning of the Fete dela Musique (para party na kaagad).
I hope to see my long-lost father, who has been there for two months touring with the APO. Wala na kaming tatay dito sa bahay...haaay. We all can't wait for him to come home, but it'd be great if I could see him in the States.
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