Monday, February 27, 2006
up diver down
I did it I did it I did it I did it!!!
I'm a scuba diver!
Licensed last February 26, 2006, in the waters of Subic, at the site of an old sunken Spanish galleon (I obviously did not fill in my dive log afterwards because I can't remember the name of the dive-site). I haven't felt such a sense of accomplishment in so long! Especially with what I had to go through to learn.
I guess I should start with what made me decide to get licensed. Well, I've tried scuba diving several times before but they were only introductory dives. This is when non-divers experience scuba with the aid of a divemaster who basically does everything for you except breathe for you. You're not allowed to go very deep, either. I always enjoyed these intro-dives but never felt compelled to pursue diving as a real hobby. I was too lazy to learn, I was afraid of all the risks and hazards involved, I was scared of what was under the ocean (though I didn't want to admit it), and I just didn't think I was the type to get into adventure sports. This was my way of thinking several years ago.
What suddenly compelled me to get into diving for real? Three things: one was when I saw beautiful underwater footage taken in Tubbataha when I sailed on the Rainbow Warrior. Not only did I feel stabs of jealousy, but it didn't feel right to me that my country's marine environment was so beautiful and that I was stopping myself from experiencing what it had to offer. The other reason was because I began a phase early this year wherein I vowed to do all the things I've been afraid of and have been running away from (this also explains why I started driving, doing capoeira, and a bunch of other things that are out of character for me). So one morning, I woke up and decided that it was time to learn how to dive.
Well there I was all gung-ho to learn how to dive on my first day in Subic... only to have to abort my first dive because of ear problems. I couldn't equalize while descending (that means you can't clear your ears to adjust to the surrounding water pressure- very painful) and got hit by vertigo everytime I surfaced. With heavy heart and only half my hearing left, I went back to my hotel room to get some rest before my second attempt. I had failed the first time, and had wrecked my ears (to what extent, I am yet to find out when I see the ear doc tomorrow). Did that mean I couldn't do it? I was a bit disapointed, and also afraid for my hearing. How bad was the damage? A few hours later, when Tom called me back for my second try, I almost wanted to just stay in my room. But I knew I had to go there, suit up, and do it. I wanted to be a diver!
I went on to complete all four required dives over the weekend (despite popping ears. I am still half-deaf), and enjoyed it, too.
And you know what I realized? I am the adventurous type after all. And I feel really proud of myself doing this. Overcoming this unknown has helped make me much, much braver about facing the greater unknown that is coming soon (you all know what that is!)
The victory picture! Shown here with my classmate/dive-buddy Roy (left-most), and our teacher Tom. Baywatch we ain't.
And after experiencing that wonderful feeling of being weightless 60 feet under the surface of the ocean, I'm officially hooked. I cannot WAIT to hit Anilao. I hope I get to do so before I leave.
Want to be a diver? Contact Diver's Network.poi!
One of my resolutions this year was to learn to feel comfortable in my own body. I've never quite gotten used to being so tall, and long, and lanky, which is why I was always too shy to dance or do sports growing up. I have terrible coordination, I have no grace, and I'm always bound to hit something with my long limbs.
But life is too short, and I'm only going to have one body in this lifetime. I decided that now is the time to get to know it well. I never thought I'd find my coordination with Zips (click if you want to learn).
It helps to have a partner. And it looks great on the beach.
When you get good enough, you can try it with fire :-) Maybe I will reach that level some day.
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Wednesday, February 22, 2006
grieving from far away
I've had so much to say, but I can't think of how to express my feelings in a way that hasn't been said before. There's the Leyte tragedy. We're all sad about the killer landslide that wiped out an entire village and so many human lives in a matter of seconds. We all want to cry when we read about hope dimming each day for the rescue of 100 plus little children and teachers still stuck in a school buried under 30 meters of earth. It's heartbreaking.
For the umpteenth time, all fingers are pointed at illegal logging. Must this always be the reason for so many of our environmental catastrophes- floods, landslides, etc. Do we ever learn? This is Mother Nature's kharma for the crimes we commit against her.
People are suffering and grieving, and I hate how I feel so helpless. As with many other instances when our fellow human beings have needed help, I wish I could be there physically to play a more hands-on role. Non-material support is just as important as donations, and I think the only way that I'll stop feeling so helpless against suffering is if I go to where the suffering is and offer what cannot be given materially.
I know alot of people feel the way I do, but very few actually heed this inner call. It's not easy to just pack up your bags and head off to a far-away place to offer a helping hand. It is often a risky prospect, plus, there are obligations to attend to, there's work, and family, and every day life.
I wish I could be there, but there is also a right place and time for everything. Right now, I belong here. Maybe when I am truly ready and equipped to undertake such a mission, the universe will present me with a true opportunity.EDSA day
It's almost EDSA day and all around there are documentaries, and TV specials, and articles, and exhibits featuring the day when the Filipino people invented the peaceful revolution. Seeing scenes from the revolution always brings tears to my eyes. It was a moment when our people took matters into their own hands; they fought for our country, our freedom, our democracy. It was also a moment of complete surrender and trust in God. The people in EDSA knew that the possibility of death was very real, and yet they stood their ground with prayer and untiy as their only weapons. They stopped those tanks from rolling over them, not with force, but with goodwill. It happened so many years ago, but to me it still stands as a ray of hope against the cynicism that plagues us.
I was able to drop by a People Power photo-exhibit in Glorietta today. It featured events along EDSA from the first People Power revolution till the present, from Edsa 1, Edsa Dos, and Edsa tres. It also showed scens from both Ninoy and Marcos's funerals. Everyone seemed to be in such a solemn mood while viewing the pictures, seeing the many tides that have swept the face of our political scene the past two decades.
Many people say that Edsa 1 failed, and that despite kicking out a tyranical dictator, we're still stuck with corrupt politicans and government officials, and a sinking economy. But I don't believe Edsa 1 failed. Rather, I choose to believe that it is not over. It started a wave of change, a wave that is yet to reach it's peak, one that we're still riding. We are still making the change, and as the new generation, we are the change.speaking of change...
Leaving the country that raised you makes you appreciate and love it all the more, and I often dream of the ways I hope to make changes some day. We all dream of making changes, but we don't really know what kind of change and how to go about it. But as an individual who is young and still (foolishly) idealistic, these are my dreams for the Philippines:
To have education readily available to everyone- It would be neat if education could be made available to all, not just official schooling but vocational courses. People would have more options in their means to make a living if they only honed their skills. I hope to spend a part of my life teaching.
That we learn to sustain and preserve our environmental resources- In grade school, our teachers always told us that a country's greatest wealth lies in "likas na yaman" (natural resources). Not everyone here has the money to see El Nido and other environmental reserves, but if everyone did, they'd have to agree that the Philippines is one of the most beautiful places on earth. We need people to be more aware of what's going on!
It's my dream to see the Filipino people be proud of being Filipino- Not because we can beat the Americans (or anyone else) at what they do, but because we're better than anyone else at what WE do. We are the best in the world at being what we are: Filipinos. But first we have to figure out what "Filipino" is.
We're not at a lack for talented, and intelligent people. We are not at a lack for culture, what with seven-thousand-something islands, each with it's own dialects, local culture, and tribes. But what we do lack is cultural self-esteem. I want us to be proudly and uniquely Filipino, not as a show for the world, but for ourselves.
It's not right to compare, but my dad once pointed out what an amazing thing it is that Brazilian artists, young and old, can sing about how much they love Brazil in almost every other song in their albums. Their love for their country and culture is so present, so real, that it pervades even throughout their music. What's more, they sing about love for their country in their own language which means they're singing for their own people, not to impress outsiders. As a result, their own culture is their contribution to the world.
Sure, we've been colonized many times over, and sometimes it's hard to pick out what aspects of our culture are truly "ours", and what are just things imposed on us by former colonizers. We cannot erase the tracks left behind by history. But we can own what we have now, and what we've always had.un-Ala Paredeses
I'm about to rant over something very superficial, but you don't know just how annoying it is until someone actually swipes your identity on the internet. This is the only way I can retaliate.
There's this girl pretending to be me on Multiply AND friendster. She swiped my personal info and stole a whole bunch of my pictures from my site and claimed them as her own. (I'm not saying who she is but there are many ways to find out if you know how). Needless to say, I was significantly miffed when I found her page.
What I always ask is what do these people get out of pretending to be someone else? What satisfaction do they get out of stealing someone else's pictures, personal information, and memories, and pretending it's theirs? What? What? And why? (I want the four fake Ala Paredeses on Friendster to answer that question for me)
And if they're not going to stop, can't they at least do credible portrayals? One girl labeled her (my) photo-album as "pichurz", and another girl faking me once put "kikay stuffs" under her list of interests. Not only are they stealing my identity, but they're also making people think I talk and spell like a... never mind.
So... my main point is, if any of these people try to do anything funny under my name, you know it's not me.ASTIG-matism
I'm part of the club. Nerdville, I have arrived.
I am by no means blind without these glasses, but billboards and signs along EDSA are easier to read now. Not that I was having alot of trouble before. It's just all clearer now. Like the "sharpen image" tool in Photoshop. :-) (God, what a geek)
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Wednesday, February 15, 2006
why i've been offline for a week
I just wrote a long entry that spanned 3 pages but instead of publishing it on my blog, I decided to send it to Inquirer's "Youngblood" section instead. I figured it was worth a shot. Who knows? It just might get published. And if it doesn't, rest assured it will be up on this blog in a few days. ;-)
In the meantime, I am up to my neck in packing. Sifting through all your accumulated material possessions of 22 years is no picnic, especially when you're sick. I've been steadily losing my voice the past week (earning me the nickname "Macy Gray" from a friend). It's a bit embarrassing when I have to use the phone, because I sound like an asthmatic, old walrus. The dust in my house hasn't helped me one bit.
But I digress: back to the packing. I've spent more than a week packing. I wake up for lunch, and start packing in the afternoons till 2am, before collapsing into an exhausted heap into my bed. I even pack on weekend nights while everyone is out partying. I know my friends are starting to hate me for not spending as much time with them as they thought I would, but the truth is, packing is all I can think about.
It is Nino who keeps me sane, and saves me from getting lost in the jungle of my possessions piled up in my room. He has the sort of obsessive-compulsive, systematic mind that automatically categorizes objects; which is excellent because otherwise I wouldn't have a clue where to begin. Without him, my brain would explode like those aliens in "Mars Attacks". He's speeded up my packing triple-time.
But today (Valentine's Day) I did zero packing and slept all afternoon. It was wonderful.
The work continues tomorrow. Till I'm done, there will probably be no entries.but the good news is...
I've been driving myself around the metro (finally!), I think I am starting to look less idiotic in Capoeira (although I am definitely still in the idiot stage), I passed my Scuba written exams, I cooked an entire meal today for the first time, and I have a new potted plant. Tulips. Yellow. A Valentine's present. :-)
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Sunday, February 05, 2006
ultra tragic
Game show stampede: 74 dreams crushed
TV execs, game show host summoned over deadly stampede
Security men did all they could to contain crowd -- ABS-CBN
I don't know what happened yesterday. I don't know how the heck it happened, why it had to happen, I don't know. To say anything about it seems ireverrent to the 73 people who lost their lives, but to not say anything about is outrageous!
Okay to begin... what the f*ck was that??? What kind of bullsh*t goes on in this country where 73 people lose their lives over a noon time show?!?! Reading the news paper this morning got me so upset and angry.
There are just so many angles from which to speak about it. For one, it was a security issue. I wonder if the 215 security personnel the network claimed to have dispatched were actually trained in crowd control. They hired in-house security from ABS and Ultra, some Pasig policemen, traffic cops, and tanods. I know that traffic men and barangay tanods aren't, and I don't think the Pasig Police aren't all that highly trained either. Four people died at the Muziklaban last year because they supposedly hired jeepney drivers and other un-trained personnel to act as "bouncers". Couldn't they have hired the SWAT?
It's a poverty issue. How disturbing to see people place their hopes for a better future on the glitzy promises of their celebrity idols. Wala na bang katapusan ang paghihirap ng mga tao dito? Noontime show nalang ba ang pag-asa nila?
It's about noontime shows preying on the desperation of their audience in the name of "helping the poor" and "wanting to make them happy". Is this how they help the poor Filipinos? Take advantage of their poverty to win the ratings war? Because we all know that's what it's all really about, right? Ratings! It's not like they're doing the Filipino audience a favor by airing the content they put into those shows.
These are just my fragmented thoughts. I really don't know what to think, and I don't know whose fault it is. It's their fault, and it's our fault, and it's everyone's fault. It's society's fault, it's the media's fault, the government's fault, the fault of the generation before us, and of the generation before that. We all created this situation.
So now I want to ask: may pag-asa pa naman diba? I don't know the answer and I don't know how to alleviate poverty, but I do know that media, government, society are all connected and we've got to start making changes somewhere. Our TV shows maybe???
Now, more than ever, I feel like my degree in AB Communications is relevant and useful to our times, if I use it the right way.
May pag-asa pa naman, diba?Sali na, dalhin ang barkada
Umuulan dito ng pera
Sali na, pati ang pamilya
Sa happy-sappy magic-plastic
Ihaw-ihaw all-time
Noon-time show
-"Noontime Show", by the Itchywormsand now for some good news
Cars are dirty. They not only poison the air we breathe, but they emit tons of greenhouse gases into the atmosphere (therefore contributing to climate change, but let's not get into that right now). But changing a lifestyle the world has been living for almost a century seems like a monumental task. How are we going to tell the billions of car owners all over the world to stop using their cars? It's not the kind of change you can make overnight, not even withing ten years. Cars are dirty, but we're used to them, and we need them; plus, major changes always involve money, so if you tell the world to change, chances are, noone is going to budge.
The solution? Redesign the car! Introducing Honda's Fuel Cell Vehicle FCX!
Could this be real? :-)
I first heard about this so-called "clean car" in an exhibit in Epcot Center, Disneyworld, Florida two years ago. The exhibit boasted of a car that would use a clean fuel system whose only emission was water. I don't know if Honda's FCX is the same one I saw in that exhibit, but whether or not it is, it applies the same principle.
This is a bold and daring step for which I applaud Honda for. To actually invent a car that no longer relies on fossil fuels to run is one thing, but for a massive-scale company like Honda to invest money in advertising this car, and to basically try to make it a reality in everyone's home, is another thing.
I particularly like Honda's idea of a "Home Energy Station (HES)", which not only means that you can refule FCX at home, but you can also use waste energy from HES to supply hot water to your home.
Imagine all the exciting possibilities! Gas and oil prices will no longer be an economical issue! The very face of the planet will change. This is looking far, far ahead of course.
Definitely, it will be a major challenge for Honda to get people to switch to this clean car. But I'm glad there's a car company that not only recognizes that it's time for change, but has actually tried to make that change. Go, FCX!tricked!!!
My damn friends threw me a surprise despedida last night, taking me completey off-guard! Dan, one of my best friends, fooled me into thinking he was taking me to our friend Glenn's farewell dinner, when he was in fact taking me to MY farewell party. I got all dressed up, nice dress, eye-liner, jewelry, the works!- only to lose my poise when 20 people from all parts of my life jumped out at me from the shadows shouting "Surprise!". Damn, they got me there! Ooooh, those weasels, ooooh!
There was tons of good food, and wine, and candles, and beautiful decor, and pictures stuck all over the place. But the nicest part, aside from having almost everyone I loved there (di nakapunta ang isang taong kulot), was the video Dan so lovingly made for me with the help of everyone else.
As it turns out, Dan has been stealing files from my computer and pictures from my room the past month to use in the video. Snatching my stuff from right under my nose, in other words! Ooooh, Dan, you serpent, you!
Revenge will be mine!... awwww, I love you guys.
I don't have pictures because I was too overwhelmed to even breathe normally, so I will post some as soon as my friends email me.pictures from the week
After Brigada practice...
...Wai Ying! best cheap Chinese food you'll ever get!
After dropping by the Greenpeace booth in Ateneo...
...pictures of the beautiful sunset from my beautiful campus (more pics here).
Poi practice in Belfield with the family
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