Sunday, September 30, 2007
nanayhood
Last week was my little brother's high school graduation and formal. He had arranged for all of his friends to meet up at our house before convoying to the formal, and while he was waiting, I helped him get dressed and fixed his hair for him. I realized with shock that he had gotten so tall that I literally had to bend over backwards just to reach his head and slick his hair back with gel!
Oh my God, I thought, wasn't it only yesterday when I went to the hospital to see him for the first time on the day he was born, when I peered through the glass at the red, wrinkled newborn wrapped in a blanket with pink and blue kittens on it? Wasn't it only yesterday when my ma brought home the blue-bottomed, hairy infant who was to be my brother for the next 19 years? Just yesterday, I sat beside his bassinet on his first day home from the hospital and read him story books even though he was too newborn to even realize he existed. Just yesterday, I was secretly doing his nursery-school homework for him so we could finish quickly and go outside and play. I used to place him on top of our billiards table and stuff all the balls down his shirt. I used to tell him bed time stories! I taught him his nursery school graduation speech, and I helped him read his first book.
And once when we were younger and some guy was saying really mean things about him on the internet, I wrote on the fool's comment box and made sure he'd have the self-esteem of a gnat by the time he was done reading what I said.
And now here's my little bro, all grown up and done with high school (for the second time), and going to prom (for the third time)!Then I began to think, was high school really 8 years ago for me??? Was I ever 19 years old? We were just kids yesterday. What happened?
After he left, I hopped in the car to get some groceries, and as I drove our street, I saw two more skinny neighborhood boys in suits and with slicked-back hair, standing next to their cars, and smiling as their parents took photos of them. Awwwwww!!!
And just so I'd feel extra old, I spent all day and all night making food and preparing for... the prom after party at our house! When the first batch of guests came at 12 midnight, 8 teenagers in suits and prom gowns, I found my hair bristling at the thought of all the noise, and chaos, and drunkenness that was sure to ensue during the evening. Then I caught myself and wondered when I became such a nanay! Just yesterday, I was one of these teenagers going to friends' houses and getting drunk. So when did I stop being one? When did I grow up? And how did I become so corny?
Well, it was a good thing I had two girlfriends, Trish and Nicole, sleep over that night so I had someone to feel like a nanay with.
The next day, I woke up at 7am and found 9 kids asleep in different corners of our house, 2 by the piano, some on the sofa, one who had made a makeshift bed out of two chairs, several on the floor, and one twisted up in our hammock out in the yard. It was hilarious.
They all woke up one by one and we nanays got to chat them up a bit, and we were soon swapping stories about prom and high school and we all had a good laugh. It was fun being around younger people at such a great time in their lives, and they were all such sweet kids. And like a true nanay, I made sure they all took home leftover cake!
Oh well, at least I don't look old yet. At Mio's graduation ceremony, I got asked by a parent if I was a student. That means I look 8 years younger than my actual age.
These are the cupcakes I made for the party. Aren't they a beaut? Gee, I'm so domesticated.ACT
The weekend itself was spent getting acquainted with our nation's capital: Canberra!
I made the roadtrip there with Trish and Nicole, and met up with other friends there! And since we were feeling adventurous, we stayed in a backpacker's hostel in the heart of the city.
We saw lots of Australian wildlife on the way there, wallabees, foxes, wombats, and wild dogs. Exciting! Would've been better if they weren't all ripped open and flattened on the side of the road by the cars that had run over them though. Animals are much cuter when they're alive and um... not shredded. Ironic how there were so many big signs on the road that said "Wildlife rescue. Injured wildlife? Call 1-800-blablabla". Roadkill!
Spring time is here, and it's time for Canberra's annual flower festival, the Floriade!
Flowers as far as the eye can see!
Len and Den!
Tulips on fire.
The pretty, yellow flowers were the ones I liked best.Spring is such a beautiful season. This is only the second spring I'm ever experiencing, and it's so lovely to see the earth coming alive, and seeing the grass on the filed outside my house erupt in tiny, yellow flowers that bounce in the wind.
It's springtime in the world, and it's springtime in my heart as well. :-)
Then we went to see all the cliche spots like the War Memorial (which made me feel like I was in U.P. on the street where the Oblation is), National Museum (where I actually learned alot about Australian history and culture... must go back), and of course,the Parliament.
The Parliament looks like a big Formula 1 racing track. They built it so that people with important sounding titles from all over the country, and from other countries, can come together and have arguments. And that's Trish and Nicole in the centre.
IT WAS THE BEST WEEKEND EVER!!!
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Thursday, September 20, 2007
Dear God,
Eventually I want a creative job, some sort of creative job, because I know I have much to offer the world in that aspect. I want to use my creativity, not for my own ego or self-importance, but because simply put, it is my function. My creativity has always helped others, and has made good things happen. You made me creative. Help me apply myself, and show me where to go.
Amen.
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Thursday, September 13, 2007
magical mystery mountain
The second time around, Mt. Banahaw is still as beautiful, and mystical as ever. It's had a special place in my heart ever since I went there overnight with a class back when I was in Ateneo. The mountain just has a certain magical energy to it, one that makes you feel alive and rejuvenated. Even one who does not believe in such things as spirits, faith healers, and elementals will have to agree that there is a certain something about the place that makes you treat it with awe and respect. Not only is it a nature trip, the place is also culturally unique in all the word with all it's history and new-age religious sects and cults.Just one of the many altars erected on the crevices of the mountain in the town of Kinabuhayan. This bunch of saints look particularly mossy, and weathered. Perhaps they've been there a long time.An old tree growing on the side of a cliff at Kubli Springs in the town of Dolores. The spring is nice for an afternoon dip.A shrine erected by the "Enok" cult. Notice the Masonic symbol (an eye inside a triangle) on the crucifix. The symbol is common around the area, found even on some road signs. The many religious sects around Banahaw practice a sort of neo-Catholicism, where Philippine national heroes are revered (i.e. the Rizalista cult), combined with animism and, in some cults, the belief that god is female.One of the twin lakes found in the town of Dolores. Legend has it that one lake is 'male', while the other is 'female'. Both were lovers before they were transformed into lakes, one beside the other. The lake is stunning in it's calm and natural beauty. No motor boats, jet skis, or resorts around it. Just a breathtaking, beautiful mirror reflecting the sky.Mt. Banahaw looms ever-present in the background, majestic, breath-taking, and sometimes, a bit ominous.A cold, clear mountain pool. No pipes. Nothing man-made around it. Just sweet, cold water from the rocks. Butterflies and dragon flies spiral around you while you bathe, and spiders spin their delicate webs between the rocks right near the water. Around you, mossy cliffs, and a canopy of trees and fern. Above you, the sky.A three-story tree house with running water and flushing toilet. This is at Kinabuhayan Cafe, the bed and breakfast where we stayed at. It is a popular drop-off point for those who want to trek Mt. Banahaw or Mt. Cristobal. Aside from ambiance and charming accommodations (nipa huts without walls), other things the place has to offer are spectacular gourmet food prepared with pride and heart by the host himself, Jay Herrera. Jay himself couldn't be a more charming and endearing host. Kinabuhayan Cafe is part of the Viaje Del Sol. Definitely a must for those who like to go off the beaten track.
More photos can be found here.and...
I'm back down-under and too tired from my last week and the plane ride to blog :-)
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Saturday, September 01, 2007
ramblings of a non-Catholic
Going to mass once a week is my commitment to gratitude.
It's one thing to say that I am grateful for everything in my life, but to live out my gratitude through a regular ritual somehow gives it a deeper dimension. To get up extra early on a Sunday morning (even after a night of partying), to walk with my own two feet , two streets away to the church in order to be with other people who are also grateful, makes my gratitude a much more real thing.
The very process of going already puts me in the spirit of gratitude, even the little discomforts that come with it. I may not have had enough sleep, but I'm grateful I have a little time to spare to stop and just be grateful. They say time is gold, and knowing I have that little extra time to say thank you makes me feel rich. When I walk there, I feel grateful for the use of my legs, an ability which I know I may not possess forever. When the sun beats down on me, I feel thankful to be alive and healthy enough to be outside.
Starting the week in a spirit of gratitude makes me thankful for the week I just ended, and makes me open to see and blessings coming my way in the week to come.
When I pray, rarely do I ask for anything. I just say thank you for the things I've gotten and the things I'm about to get, whatever they may be. I already know I will get what's right for me and what's meant for me, be it blessing or suffering. Who am I to say what's good and what's bad for me? Best to just try as hard as I can to be grateful for both. Like that old prayer, I just pray for guidance, the courage to do the things I have to do when the time comes, and the wisdom to determine when those moments are. I also pray to help me become more accepting of the things I cannot change.
One of my favorite moments is always when the priest says "Let us put ourselves in the presence of God". As people bow their heads, you see people bringing forward their highest selves for just an instant. Putting yourself in the presence of God is actually a way of bringing forward your own God-self, reminding ourselves that we contain a spark of that divine light that created us. But the moment only lasts for an instant which is why people are not aware of it.
Life is richer for those who are aware of the sacred symbolisms of everyday actions and everyday objects. To walk into a building like a church, a temple, or any holy place, is only a symbolism of walking inwards into our own inner sacred place. We walk into a church not to meet a statue but to meet God within ourselves, and God inside others. People who cannot see the meaning of symbols either lack imagination or are too lazy to create their own.
To me, faith needs some form of ritual in order for it to be truly present. Rituals actualize the abstract, gives earthly existence to those things we can't really touch. Even love, such an elusive thing, is only really lived out through rituals; the rituals we have in each of our relationships like eating together, or spending a day of the week with each other, saying good night. Unlived faith is like unlived love, relegated to the storage room to gather dust, waiting for the day when it will be useful.
I've always been spiritual, and I've always believed in God. But when I started committing myself to my beliefs, through a regular ritual, I feel as if I turned a dormant force within me into an active one.
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Belated happy 56th birthday to my ailing father!!!
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